The other day I threw a general question out on Facebook: "Do you ever do anything just out of Mommy Guilt?"

The answers, all 30 of them, ranged from "Daily" to "Is this a trick question?"

So moms, we are feeling a bit guilty, huh? Guilty enough to get your kids a dog? Sigh.

I didn't think I was "ready" for another pup quite yet, but apparently I have a major soft spot for begging children and little dogs with big floppy ears that were left in a box on the side of the freeway. 

As a coastal-living person, my heart went out to all those who sat and watched as thier beloved shops, restaurants and favorite spots got washed away into the Atlantic. I've heard stories from friends of the amazing summer vacations walking along boardwalks, eating all kinds of yummy foods and making life-long memories while dipping their toes in the Atlantic Ocean. I hated the fear that the shore would not recover for future generations to also have these memories. But once again, what could I do from out here? 

How about take a little trip out east to see how the other half lives? 

Next month, I will be joining about 39 other social media mom rockstars in the first Social Media for Good retreat. June 6-9th I'll will be hitting the shores of New Jersey to raise awareness for and promote the re-opening of the Jersey Shore for the 2013 summer season. The four-day #JerseyLove Retreat, hosted by Caesar’s Entertainment and D6 Sports, is aimed at encouraging the public to visit the Jersey Shore again, this year more than ever. 

I have to admit - this is also going to be a whole lotta fun. 

Seeing Atlantic City for the first time, we are all being hosted at Caesar’s Palace during the time we are there. The actual #JerseyLove Retreat kicks off with activities such as a Taste of Caesar’s dining event, wine tasting, Ladies Night Out at Harrah’s Pool After Dark and a shopping trip to support local businesses. On Friday June 7, the group will travel to Belmar, one of the hardest hit towns along the shoreline, for a beach day event where skimboard and surf lessons will be provided courtesy of D6 Sports.

Since my surfing in the Pacific has been well, less than stellar, I'm hoping to rip it up in Belmar!

There will be lots of pictures. There will be lots of tweets and updates. I'm really excited to check out life on the other coast. 

Do you have a great memory of the Jersey Shore? Any tips on things I need to do, see or eat while in Atlantic City? 

DISCLOSURE: The Social Media for Good #JerseyLove retreat is being sponsored by D6 Sports and Caesar's Entertainment. This includes accommodations, meals and transportation. All opinions are my own.

Haven't pulled an all nighter since college (or having an infant)? Have you ever wanted to ride the Matterhorn at midnight? What about a 3 AM teacup spin? Or maybe you want to see the sun rise over the Cadillac Mountain Range? 

Well, this weekend you can. 

Disneyland Resort is kicking off their "Monstrous Summer" with the park being opened for 24 hours. Start your Memorial Day Weekend on May 24, 2013, at an amazing 24-hour all-nighter in Disneyland Park and Disney California Adventure Park. Scream with delight as monster hosts Mike and Sulley drop in from Monsters University. There will also be special limited-edition "all nighter" merchandise available for those who visit the park for this 24 hour Mouse-athon. 

Click here for more information

And since you will have PLENTY of time to explore both park, be sure to swing by the new Fantasy Faire - a new extension of Fantasyland! Meet princesses in the Royal Hall and listen to new stories with Rapunzel and Belle. 

Also debuting next weekend is the new show, Mickey and the Magical Map:

 

“Mickey and the Magical Map” presents Mickey in his timeless role as the sorcerer’s apprentice. Wise sorcerer Yen Sid directs his Mapmakers, a singing-dancing ensemble cast that paints a wondrous map – capable of taking dreamers to any place imaginable and so large it spans the entire stage of the outdoor Fantasyland Theatre.

Apprentice Mickey lets his curiosity get the better of him and he stumbles upon the map’s magical powers, which take him, along with the audience, on a fantastic journey of imagination in the company of the Mapmakers. The journey, presented through theatrical stage wizardry, unveils wonderful worlds of music, color, adventure and beloved characters with each new direction – all set to an original song, “Journey of the Imagination,” and music from classic Disney films.

It's going to be a monstrously fun summer at Disneyland Resorts... are you planning on going?  

*disclosure: I have been invited to a press event at Disneyland next week that includes a hotel room and tickets to the park. I have not been monitarily compensated for this post or any upcoming social media posts about the event. 

The teacher tortured us by having all the 5 Year Olds sing a song called "Fingerprints." There was not a dry eye in the house. 

This little video was made with the coolest new App called PTCH. It's an Instagram/Vine combo that allows you to make these fab little 60 second videos with your pictures and video clips. I have a feeling I'm going to become very addicted to this app. Kimberly Blane introduced it to me last week at Mom 2.0 - of course the "Go To Mom" would know all about the coolness!

I want to leave them with a million thoughts busting out of my head, but honestly, I don't. I take copious amounts of notes. I doodle, I dream, I have all the best intentions to come home and sit down and write for hours - even days! Products! Experiences! People! The thoughts jumble in my head on my way home; All that creativity that I know is in me just waiting to get out.

Then I come home and stare, blankly, at my computer. 

Then I go lay down. 

Then I stare at my unpacked suitcase. 

Then I put away a few pieces of swag. 

Then I go back to my computer and try to force the words from my head. 

Then I play candy crush or bejeweled blitz.

Then I sink into a bit of a post-conference depression. For months I looked forward to the weekend, and now it's over. Did I accomplish what I wanted to? Did I meet all the people that I wanted to? Did I really connect the way I wanted to? The insecurities and pang of possible regrets go flying...

But deep down, I now understand that this is MY way of processing. I will never be the girl whose suitcase is unpacked within an hour of getting home. I will stare at products in branded bags for a few weeks before putting them to use or finding a home for them. My blog may lack new content for days, or weeks, as I decompress and let all that I learned, and all that I did, filter down. 

And I let myself be okay with that, because this is ME. And I know that once the dust settles, my inspiration will be waiting for me. 

What does one write about after a post like my last one? Jumping back into make-up talk seems a bit frivolous at this point… so I’ll talk about books!

I love reading. I also love just how easy it is to read suggested books when you have an eReader. It used to be that someone would recommend something, you would have to write it down then hope that you remembered the name/author/note with the information by the time you made it to Barnes and Noble. Now I go on Amazon and download the book instantly. At least that was what I did when a friend suggested the “grown up Vampire series”, The Elemental Mysteries by Elizabeth Hunter, to me.

Billed as a “paranormal romance,” this series contains four titles that follow librarian Beatrice “B” De Novo and 500 year old vampire Giovanni Vecchio as they search the world unraveling an ancient mystery. While yes, it is a love story, I hate that it’s paranormal romance, because these books are really so much better than that.  

I loved the characters, I loved the story line, I loved the history and I loved the descriptions of the places they visited. The story dragged just a bit in book three and the beginning of book four, but by that point you are so invested in the story line that it doesn’t weigh the series down. The books are not silly or comical like other books of this genre can be, and while it is an “epic romance,” its not a smut read. The author does a fabulous job of weaving the story through all four books and while the romance between the characters is anticipated and felt from page one, it develops and grows over the course of the story arch.

Elizabeth Hunter is a independent writer that I’m amazed hasn’t been immediately snapped up (but maybe she has by now?). In an oversaturated market, The Elemental Mysteries series will remind you how good vampire books can be.

The four books in the series are: A Hidden Fire, The Same Earth, The Force of Wind, A Fall of Water. Bonus? They are all super cheap and sometimes free on Amazon and iBooks. 

My list of “proper and sensitive responses” comes from years of paying attention to people’s reactions to news – both mine and others’ – because I never want to say the wrong thing or act the wrong way purely out of shock. You know how it is: Someone tells us something life-changing, or sad, or happy, and our first reaction is always some form of stunned surprise. Even if you knew your best friend had been trying to get pregnant, or were already aware of a colleague’s life-threatening illness, the actual moment when words are formed and reality is confirmed can’t be anything but shocking.

Over the last few weeks, I’ve experienced that moment time and again, when I’ve disclosed that my husband of 12 ½ years and I are separating.

Because I constantly think about how I would want to be told news, and what words would elicit which reaction, I thought I was prepared for everything … but I wasn’t. It turns out I had no expectations of how to tell people or receive their reactions to our impending divorce. With a few good friends, the initial response was a sigh. With others, it was more of a gasp. Some cried; others simply gave me a hug.

But the comment I will tuck away for moments in the future when it may be needed for someone else is this one: “I am sorry for the pain you are currently in.”

That short sentence struck me. The choice of words was just, well … perfect. And of all the mantras I’ve compiled to repeat to myself to get me through the next breath, that one stuck. Because no matter what the back-story is – the details, the who said/did whats – two adults and two children are currently in pain. Pain from change, pain from the unknown, pain for the future suddenly not being what they thought it was going to be.

Our lives will be forever altered by the word “divorce,” but amid the emotions and planning, right now I’m focusing on not letting the word define us. It’s just our current situation.

Note: Next week, I’ll be attending the blog conference Mom 2.0. I wrote this post to be cathartic, but also to give my friends and fellow attendees a heads-up. The blogging community has been a huge part of Jason’s and my lives over the last 8 years, and the decision to go forward with my plans to attend has been an exercise in courage. I will not be sharing details of our separation, but will happily take a hug (or a drink) next week. Being there is just another step to help me move forward and move on from our current situation. 

I think girlfriends are one of the most important parts of motherhood. I have such an amazing group of women in my life, both online and IRL, that are my support system from everything to feeding my kids to what shoes to wear. There are many moments in my life when I feel that I would not know what to do next without my girlfriends.

I often feel bad for men. I don't think they have the same type of bonds as women do. They don't seem to really understand why women need to talk about everything - sometimes to death!

Circle of Moms has a new video series in partnership with Kia, about just this. Being a woman and being a mom. The latest video from Circle of Moms by POPSUGAR talks about everything from sex, to growing kids, to having a better relationship with your mother-in-law. Its a lot like having a glass of wine with a girlfriend - just maybe after you've all come from a blow-out at Drybar. 

Check out the latest video and let me know your thoughts! It's a cute series with likable women. I could see myself chatting with them and adding my two cents. Do you have a special group of women in your life? 

Disclosure: This post was sponsored by Kia through their partnership with Circle of Moms. While I was compensated to review the Kia Motors video and write a review, all opinions are my own.

Hey all you fabulous North County People - where will you be Friday, April 26th?

I'm going to be at the Park Hyatt Aviara sipping and sampling some of the best food and drinks our corner of the world has to offer! Want to join me? 

Buy yout tickets now and save $10 when you enter PROMO CODE: HIPMAMAB

Event Information

Special appearances by the region’s top chefs, wine and food tastings from leading dining destinations and unexpected entertainment elements make for an unforgettable evening. Supports Fresh Start Surgical Gifts.

Park Hyatt Aviara
7100 Aviara Resort Drive, Carlsbad
April 26, 2013
6:30 - 9:30PM

#NOCO2013 

*sponsored post: for posting this I received free tickets to this event. 

But do we cry? Goodness No! - Pete the Cat

And just like that, I'm another year older. 

This year, April 14th officially put me in my late 30's. The "twilight" of the decade. It marks 20 years since I have graduated high school and 20 years since I was proclaimed by the USA that I was officially, and legally, an adult. 

I'm not really old - but I'm no spring chicken. I've had 38 years to grow and mature, learn and be schooled. Forty and the expectations for how wonderful that decade will be (as all the magazines, and Oprah, proclaim these days) is calling me. "You are fully aware of who you are in your 40s.." they claim. 40 is when you really come into yourself. 

So that means I have two more years to make my bullshit thirties count? 

I remember turning 28 and loving it. Feeling mature, yet young. No kids, married, working - sleeping in on weekends and staying up late. Your late twenties are the great equalizer of life. Even the people who still haven't gotten life together, who still act as if they are in college, are fun to hang out. Some people had it together and were reaping the benefits of having a good income. But it didn't matter because you were young!

But 38 is a different story. I am young compared to some. But also feeling the pull of middle age - gravity, hormone changes, the crap part. No longer can I lay on the beach in reckless abandonmnet. Now I'm there in a big hat with 50+ sunscreen all over my body, yelling at my kids to be careful. My world revolves around this tricky game of balance - kids, work, me, marriage, home - a juggling act that can come crashing down at a moments notice. Am I sad or depressed about it? No. But there is a part of me that longs for the days where I had less to juggle on a daily basis.

Then I look ahead 10 years to 48... I'll have an almost 20 year old and a 16 year old! Where will I be? WHO will I be at that point?

I can't even begin to imagine.